Wires

I messed up. I think either I got the wrong impression or I acted on the right impression too late. And knowing how much “game” I lack, there’s no way for me to know where I went wrong. Either it was me, and I was dumb… or it was me, and I was stupid. Either way, I didn’t want to bother Erin much more than I already had by asking her out. But, being so smooth-brained, I still did.

We never used to text much, but when we did, it was good. We shared memes. We exchanged heart reactions to each other’s messages. There were even a couple of flirts in there. Or so I thought. I thought it’d be wise if I made it clearer that I was interested in her. So I found reasons to message her. We already shared a common interest in Jazz so I asked her to recommend a couple of underground bands that she was aware of and then we vibed. Again, or so I thought.

When Erin turned down my offer for a date, I thought the problem was that I showed too much interest. Maybe I suddenly became too insufferable by forcing myself to find a reason to talk to her. I asked her if that was the case. Did I seem desperate? Erin just sighed. I recognised that type of sigh from my school’s parent’s evening. I didn’t consider the one more likely possibility. She really was just happy to have me as a friend.